Recently I have seen many movies, been around many people, and read many essays and books on love. I believe that the Proclamation to the World on the Family, along with the scriptures and words of the prophets give us a real understanding of love (for a more in-depth look at love read Strengthening Our Families: An In-Depth Look at the Proclamation on the Family).
The word love is used five times in the Proclamation to the World on the Family. Every time that it is used, it is combined with an action term (i.e. to love and care, or to love and serve). The language suggests that love is something that we do—that we have some choice about and can control. In modern society however, love is something we “fall into” and “out of,” something that “hits us.” In fact, the idea of love as solemn responsibility seems strange in a society where love is usually portrayed as mindless irresponsibility or subordination of your head to your heart.
When the rich young man asked Jesus, “What good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life? (Matt. 19:16)” part of Jesus’ answer was the command to love his neighbor. In order to understand this command we must know what Jesus meant by the word love. In today’s world, it has many meanings. It may express a romantic feeling, strong affection or interest, commitment, concern, satisfaction, preference, or just sexual gratification. Until we understand the Savior’s definition of love, we will have a very hard time obeying His command. President Hinckley described love this way:
Love is of the very essence of life. It is the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Yet it is more than the end of the rainbow. Love is at the beginning also, and from it springs the beauty that arches across the sky on a stormy day. Love is the security for which children weep, the yearning of youth, the adhesive that binds marriage, and the lubricant that prevents devastating friction in the home; it is the peace of old age, the sunlight of hope shining through death… love, like faith, is a gift of God.
The scriptures command us to love in complex ways. Instead of simple commands to love, they combine “thou shalt love” with a verb and noun phrase making some kind of action associated with the command (see Exodus 20:5-6; Leviticus 19:18-19; Deuteronomy 10:12-13; 12:3-4; Nehemiah 1:5; Mosiah 4:15; D&C 20:19; 42:22). When God commands us to love, His language teaches us that love is more than an inner feeling; the heart, might, mind and strength all must unite in love. Repeatedly in “love and serve,” “love and obey,” “love and cleave,” the point is made that real love requires each aspect of self, not just part of us. The heart is important, just like the mind and might of physical activity, of doing as the love-filled heart directs us. There is really no choice except to act if we truly love, for God said, if we love Him, we will keep His commandments (John 14:15). In our marriages and families, we must love with our hearts, our minds, our spirit, and our hands.
Even though love might live in our heart or mind, and so be somewhat emotional, it is more than emotion. It is also manifest in other parts of us. Love is a feeling, but it is not only a feeling. It is behavior but not only behavior. Our ability to love, and our behavior in love is under our control, or God could not command us to love, nor could we teach love to our children.
Today there is a movement in pop psychology called the self-esteem movement. It has reshaped the worldview on many topics ranging from what makes a healthy childhood to what constitutes a meaningful life. The “self-esteem” literature often places love of self in priority over love of God and love of neighbor. LDS philosopher James Faulconer expressed concern that many in the LDS community seem to have accepted the worldly philosophy of self-priority.
Some think that it is scriptural that you must love yourself before you can love others. Self-esteem is not part of the scriptures or the Christian heritage. Actually, the whole notion of “self-image” as something we should focus on, evaluate, polish, work to improve, and in effect serve, verges on the love of other gods forbidden in the first commandment and idolatry forbidden in the second.
Sometimes people try to justify themselves with scriptures. The Savior’s statement, “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself” (Lve. 19:18) is usually cited as if love of self is an important part of the equation. But remember that Jesus was quoting the Mosaic Law, using the “as thyself” to say, in effect, treat your neighbor at least as well as you treat yourself. Faulconers argued:
The scripture assumes that those to whom it is addressed love themselves, but it doesn't command them to do so. … the command to love another as myself is not a command to love myself. It assumes I do, and it tells me to use that as a standards for loving others. Without adding something to it that isn't there, it says no more than that.… As such, it sets a minimum standards for conduct; it doesn't tell us that we ought to think of ourselves, either first or at all.
Near the end of His life, the Savior gave the new principle of love that went beyond the Mosiac law. His new commandment (John 13:34) set a higher standard for Christian Love. We are now commanded to “love one another as I have love you,” and the potential sacrifice required was clarified in Jesus’ statement that “greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13). In our marriages and families, we can gladly make the daily sacrifices and do the daily service that Jesus exemplified in His life.
Love grows as we serve and sacrifice for each other. Our loving acts generate love among those we love and serve. Our obedience to the loving example of the Savior opens our life to the influence of the Holy Spirit and to divine grants of love. Love, often called charity in the scriptures, only comes as a gift from God (Moroni 7:47-48; 1 Corinthians 13:13).
-Moss
The weapons of choice were, for me a little metal coffee mug...and for Moss and little metal chair.
We each took our turn rolling the die to find out who would be granted the chance to make the first move. I won the coveted award, apparently the game knows who deserves it the most. The game was going well and we were both pretty close to each other but then the worst happen. I got a brain cramp and lost on a stupid questions about Phoebe's brother and Moss took advantage of it and made some good distance on the next few questions.
Just as I was starting to worry I may need to start watching 4 episodes a day to beat the kid that can see something once and remember it forever I pulled ahead.
Before we knew it I was about 10 spaces ahead. Moss quickly caught up though with a few good rolls and some lucky guesses. Then we got a call from a friend asking to come over and swim so we needed to do a sudden death question so we could go clean the pool. I was so excited that I had another Brain cramp and Moss totally won it.
I was so mad... It's no fair Moss was already is the smartest at the important stuff now he is the smartest at the really important stuff.
I don't know when we will be able to play again, it may take a while for the scares to heal...
